A blog about tabletop hobby and or strategy games, with a side order of electronic turn based goodness here and there. Now with tons of retro gaming content both electronic and tabletop. Also with 20% more self loathing douchebaggery!

Sunday, October 30, 2011

A Rant on Communication

This is something I have wanted to say for a long damned time, and as my posting has been quiet this month it makes sense to use now as the time for saying what needs to be said:


This also goes with not wanting someone to continue to play in your group.

I get it I mean I do.  People are passive aggressive wusses who are too afraid of any form of confrontation ever.

So doing things like just not responding to scheduling emails, or when someone talks to you about a game and you aren't interested you just delete the message and act like the game never happened, or if someone is a complete tool you do the RPGnet approved "Lie and say the game isn't taking place" because that can't ever come back and cause more trouble than your chickens(*& self thinks you are avoiding by rightfully telling someone they are being a douche and you don't want them there any more is what everyone does.

(Its not just gaming.  Its why "I'll call you" in dating circles really means "Thanks for the sex but I never intend to talk to you again but I am what I just got out of you last night and can't be honest with you".)

This is enormous jerkfacery of the highest level and its GOT TO BLOODY STOP.

If you are interested in a game but upon hearing more details and it doesn't sound like its your bag its OK to say "Sorry, its not my thing.  Good luck and I hope you have fun".

This is both POLITE, and nice.  You can in fact think its the worst idea for a game in the history of ever but its not like you have to say that.

Just letting the person know you won't be participating is good enough.

But nobody does that do they?  As I mentioned, RPGnet even ENCOURAGES this sort of rude, wussy, passive aggressive handling of things.

Instead all you really do is waste other people's time as they prepare for games they won't be playing in or have people show up for, which is VERY GODDAMNED RUDE.  These days it seems like we all have less and less free time.

Your bitch ass deciding to in the middle of the game claim your wive/husband/dog/ect needs you at home and you run out never to be seen again is the height of dickery.  Outside of the most mentally unbalanced person, who is gonna care if you say "Sorry I don't think this is working out" and then leave?

Or if you are that afraid of personal confrontation about pretend Elf and Space Marine games, just finish that session, and make a phone call or email the next day saying you will no longer be playing.


I've seen so much of it over the years both as a passive and active participant in someone else's inability to be polite.  I refuse to engage in it.  If I think a game sucks and I am quitting?  I almost always let the group know as I leave for the day so they know not to waste any more of their game time on me.  The few times I just leave after a game?   I STILL make sure someone in the group knows I am not coming back ASAP.

Even if I utterly loathe the game or people I now know to avoid at all costs I still respect them as human beings and show them basic decency.

The game groups where I see this sort of behavior constantly done always end up terrible and its usually a sign to run like hell.

So show respect to your fellow human beings and if you aren't interested in playing or continuing to play a game you have already started interacting with take that whopping 2-5 minutes and make a phone call or send an email saying so.

Heck, if you have enough gusto to (respectfully) say why you are leaving/don't want someone else to play?  They may learn from their actions and correct bad behaviors, if not with you, possibly in the future.

But this is me hoping people show common courtesy and respect for each other and that's just silly talk.  All you have to do is see cigarette butts and garbage strewn all around, or shopping carts laying about in parking lots as opposed to the minute it would take to put them in their proper places to know we as humanity don't have any courtesy whatsoever.

And that is terrible.

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