A blog about tabletop hobby and or strategy games, with a side order of electronic turn based goodness here and there. Now with tons of retro gaming content both electronic and tabletop. Also with 20% more self loathing douchebaggery!

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Games Workshop: Fanboys Just Aren't Helping Any More.

For those who haven't heard, Games Workshop has released their latest quarterly investor update.

The results are.. not good.  In fact, they are about as far from good as you can get.

http://www.belloflostsouls.net/2014/07/bombshell-gw-2014-annual-report.html

Basically income is down, and profit is WAAAAAY DOWN.  GW's continuing resolve to ignore anyone but whatever dinks in the company think is best is basically killing them more and more every financial quarter.

We are discussing this at Something Awful and even have a "Guess when GW goes out of business/gets bought out" thread.

A fellow named Bulbasaur found some choice quotes from GW fanboys explaining exactly what is killing GW games, and is honestly a bit of a hit on minis games as a whole:

More reports from the front lines:
A second hand army will never garner the same affection, pride or sense of accomplishment that building and painting a starter army yourself. As a starter army, this robs the gamer of 75% of the enjoyment of the hobby. Should never be recommended to new players. People who play miniature games just to play a game should stick to video games or heroscape.

This statement here?  This is what makes playing minis games such a goddamned colossal pain in the willy.

Its not about nifty toys to play a game, nope!  ITS AN ART PROJECT YOU SOMETIMES PLAY A GAME WITH!

NO.  NO NO NO NO.  If I want to just build stuff I would buy Japanese model kits.  The price and technology in them are light years beyond what GW has ever pulled out of their backsides.

This kit here?  US Store mark up to 30 bucks, or what some of those 1 inch Marine Commanders cost.  (JPN MSRP is closer to 20 US, or the other ripoff Marine HQs.)

Its molded in like 5 or 6 colors, snap fit, clear and complete instructions even if you don't speak any Japanese, and pose able as you like.  You can even buy little 5 dollar bases or 7 dollar upgrade kits to like give em new guns and gear or pose them in ways that wouldn't normally balance on their own.

Or for the same price without an import store markup (I should really get my Gundam kits from Amazon.  Closer to JPN MSRP.  A normal sized HG kit is 1575 yen.  Or about 22 bucks from Bandai's Amazon store.  Yeah.) this 1 inch tall glue only figure molded in grey.  Tough choice Art Project Shmucks!


http://wargamedork.blogspot.com/2010/09/review-corner-high-grade-universal.html  Games Workshop doesn't even have PREMIUM QUALITY to fall back on!  Yet people kiss their butts and try to convince themselves getting ripped off because of skulls and silly proportioned figures and an absurd backstory currently being milked in ways that would make Peter Jackson ashamed.  (How many books is the Horus Heresy series now?  Over 30?)

And they kind of have to insist ITS REALLY AN ART PROJECT NOT A GAME because the rules are bad and generally getting worse over time as opposed to better.

AT-43 beat the SNOT out of 40K's ruleset and you could be playing within minutes of opening a box.  (Plus a nice universal mechanics chart that had auto succeed and fail levels to simulate things like a machinegun firing at point blank range or getting hit as a soldier by an anti tank weapon. And amazing prepaints.)



If you can handle my monotone nasal ass voice and 480p camera watch that.  SEE QUALITY AND VALUE.

OH GOD HOW WILL I HAVE OWNERSHIP IF I ONLY FLOCK THE BASES?  I MIGHT ACTUALLY PLAY PLEASING TO THE EYES MINIATURES GAMES WITH THEM AND REALIZE HOW BAD GW RULES ARE!!

Warmahordes has a continually evolving ruleset and metagame based around the tourney scene which makes it an appealing game.  I don't know what the UK is like but in the US the organized play/tourney scene basically rules all.  (Doesn't hurt that US gamers are fantastic at being antisocial and sort of need a SHOW UP AT X TIME AND PLAY SOMEONE YOU BUTTHEAD deal.  I hate GAMER ASPERGERS.)  GW games are designed around gentlemen playing friendly games then going round to the Pub.  Except very few people actually play that way and even good friends can be irredeemable power gamers who want to win at all cost.

(Because have a good time with folks is SILLY TALK.  WE MUST WIN AT ALL COSTS. *barf*)

Hell, buy a new Warcaster or swap one or two units out of your force and the entire army plays completely different thanks to synergies, strategies, and unit abilities!  (Which are all on the card of the unit you just bought as opposed to needing a 50 dollar hardback.  If you want you can get your army books for 40-30 hard or soft if its your bag but... you don't really NEED to!)

HEY LOOK KIDS!  FULL COLOR SOFT BACK RULEBOOK AND FACTION/ARMY BOOK.  30 DOLLARS EACH!  

X Wing ships cost less than those Marine HQs and its a great game system that you need few models for.  And its prepainted with all the rules and goodies you need in each pack.  For a massive IP the game company doesn't own and thus can't really exploit!

Prepainted?  Preassembled?  Tokens and other play aids?  Different ways to use the same miniature making it useful on its own, in multiples, or bits to help other models?  THIS IS NOT THE GAMES WORKSHOP WAY!

Yet GW has pushed on with its stupid prices (defended by comparing to other rich idiot hobbies.  Hell, almost anything can be considered cheaper to gambling.  Doesn't mean it is accurate or appropriate!  THIS IS TOY SOLDIERS.  A BOARDGAME WITH 3D BOARDS.), and insistence it is an art project instead of a game.

And its doing horrible Tumblr fangirls writing about Sherlock and Supernatural things the ass.  HARD.

Hero Quest and Space Crusade are really what got GW games going in the late 80s.  They don't have any jump in point any more.

This is my jam.  This is what made GW in the first place.

Provide the board game miniatures separate for people who want extras to expand their boardgames?  To use for their armies so they don't need to break up/buy the games?  NO NO NO.  GW DOES NOT AGREE WITH THIS GIVE US MORE MONEY.

NO STAND ALONE GAMES YOU CAN USE TO EXPAND YOUR TABLETOP WARGAMES OR TO USE ON IT'S OWN AND MAYBE GET INTO THE WIDER GAMES VIA EXPANDING THE GAME SHALL NOT HAPPEN.  GIVE US 80 DOLLARS FOR THE HARDBACK RULESBOOK, 50 FOR YOUR ARMY BOOK, ANOTHER 40 FOR THE SUPPLEMENT BOOK AND THEN BUY OUR OVERPRICED MODELS.

NO STARTER GAMES IN DEPARTMENT STORES DAMN YOU!  MARKETING IS FOR LOSERS!  COME TO OUR WEBSTORE OR OUR 1 MAN HOLE IN THE WALL SHOPS IF YOU LIVE IN SELECT AREAS.  YOU CAN ONLY FORGE THE NARRATIVE WE TELL YOU TO!  AND UNPAINTED MODELS AND HOUSE RULES ARE NOT NARRATIVE FORGING.  BUYING RIDICULOUS MODELS AND TOOLS YOU COULD GET FOR A TENTH THE PRICE AT HOME DEPOT IS!

 They treat retailers and the end customer like garbage.  They don't playtest or care about anything but seeing how much they can charge for silly overpriced figures you might one day get to play a poorly balanced, archaic, unfun game with.

This is why they are so screwed.

1 comment:

Arquinsiel said...

The UK scene is the exact opposite of the US scene. They do actually playtest, but it's targeted to rotate power units and thus shift inventory fast.

There's a steady decline in the bottom line, but they're still making multiple millions in profit. They're doing fine TBH.

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